Week 14 Reading Diary A: After the Battle

p.307-349

The part that interested me the most is the night raid and the survivors. So Ashwatthaman, I will call him Ash for short since the name is so long. So Ash decided to invade the Pandava camp but didn't realize that Krishna and the Pandavas decided to sleep outside that night... he chose a bad night to invade their camp. Ash tried to attack Shiva but Shiva swallowed his weapons. That caught me by surprised.. I did not know Shiva can just swallow weapons or items like that? How powerful is he? Then Ash goes and starts killing the armies led by king Draupada and then Rakshasas started eating the dead bodies? That is so gross!!! I was quite disturbed when reading that part in the book... couldn't be more disgusting.

Then the survivors all came together and that is how the Mahabharata was formed. They prepared funerals for the dead ones or those who lost the battle.

Fierce Ash fighting in the battle: Ashwatthaman

Week 13 Storytelling: Sikhandini and Sthuna

The day of Sikhandini and her wife's marriage was magical. Both of them were happy and loved each other. However, Sikhandini had been hiding a huge secret from her wife. Sikhandini was a woman in disguise as a man because of her father Shiva. After their marriage, Sikhandini planned on telling her wife about her true sexuality. She cannot hide it anymore especially not to her true love.

"My dearly beloved, I must tell you something very important and you will probably never look at me the same way again, but I love you so much that I must tell you... I am a woman" said Sikhandini.

Sikhandini's wife looked at her in disbelief and Sikhandini had to undress herself to prove that she was a woman. The wife looked at her and cried. 

"Please don't cry my love... I heard of a yaksha that could possibly change me into a man. We will be husband and wife." said Sikhandini.

The next day Sikhandini set out to find the yaksha Sthuna to see if he could change her into a man. She loved his wife so much she couldn't stand the pain her wife is going through. She should have told her before they got married or done something earlier about changing her gender, but it was too late. Sikhandini hoped that Sthuna will be able to change her into a man so she can make her wife happy. Sikhandini finally reached to Sthuna's house. She knocked on the door and it opened...

"Hello Sthuna, my name is Sikhandini and I heard that you can change me into a man. I want nothing more than to actually become a man. Please! Please! I want to make my wife happy for I am deeply in love with her. She wanted to leave me because I am a woman but I was taught my whole life to be a boy. Now I really want to change into a boy." said Sikhandini

Sikhandini started to break down and cried. She sat in front of Sthuna's door step because she was under so much pressure. She was taught to become a boy all her life and now finally she found a woman she loved but her love would not accept her for who she was.

"Don't cry Sikhandini. I will help you but I have to tell you that I cannot just change you into a man, but I am willing to trade gender with you. I have heard stories of how your father Shiva wanted a boy all his life and tried so hard to change you into a boy. You have struggled and tried to make him proud and now you have to suffer again when you finally found your true love. I cannot imagine the pain you are going through. I promise I will help you and we can switch gender." said Sthuna.

"However, we can only trade gender for a few years. I want to explore and learn what it is like as a female but I do not wish to become a female for the rest of my life. I will make you a promise and let you become a man so that you and your wife can bear a child. After that I will take my identity back. Is that clear?" said Sthuna.

"Yes! Thank you so much Sthuna! I promise you after our first child. I will come back and we can switch back to our original gender. If my wife leaves me when I become a woman again. At least I will have a child and hopefully a son to carry on the family name and make Shiva proud!" said Sikhandini.

"All right, well prepare for this spell I am about to prepare. It is a spell that will swap our gender. You will be in my body and I will be in yours. Our faces will remain the same but different features. This may be quite painful but if you are willing to do this I will start the spell now." said Sthuna.

"I'm ready" said Sikhandini.

Sthuna began chanting the spell... 

I decided to do a transgender symbol to go with my story because that is like what Sikhandini and Sthuna are going through.

Sikhandini and Sthuna

Author's Note: I decided to do the story over Sikhandini and Sthuna's transformation. I wanted to emphasize how desperate Sikhandini wanted to become a man. She was taught to be a man all her life and in order to please her wife she had to make the transformation. Sikhandini went through a lot of pain in her life to fulfill her father's dream of having a son. I wanted to emphasize the pain and suffering she went through being pressured to become a man her whole life. I also wanted to show how Sikhandini thought being a man could solve all her problems and that she was unhappy with her own gender. I felt like this story relates to many people who have gender identity issues and that is the reason why I chose this story. Sikhandini always thought of herself as a boy even though she knew she was a girl deep down. Since Sikandini thought of herself as a boy, she fell in love with a woman that her father arranged her with. In a way, I kind of blame Shiva for not accepting her as a girl and forcing her to be a boy. Whether or not she is happy being a boy or a girl it should be Sikhandini's choice and not Shiva. She was trained to be a boy and even fell in love with a woman. She would do anything for her love. Sthuna was nice and understood the pain Sikhandini was going through. He decided to grant her wish by trading gender with her but not forever. The transformation was only for a few years until Sikahandini is able to bear her own child.

Bibliography: William Buck Mahabharata 

Week 13 Reading Diary B: Sikhandini

p.247-305

The part of Amba's story caught my attention. Because Shiva wanted a male child so badly he raised his girl Sikhandini to be a boy and even arrange marriage her to a girl. Poor Sikhandini all her life she was taught that being a boy was better and wasn't value for own identity. Why is that most women in indian epics have to go through so much? Well Sikhandini's wife found that she was a female and begged Sthuna to change gender with Sikhandini. Sthuna is such a nice person and he was punished for his good deed by Vaishravana who was outraged that they switched genders. So he cursed Sthuna that he would remain a female until Sikhandini die.

I thought it was very brave and nice of Sthuna to switch genders with Sikhandini. I don't think he should be punished. If Shiva would have accepted that his "son" was actually a female then none of this would have happened. A parent should always accept their child for who he/she is no matter what. But this is indian epics and stories are different. Sikahandini was taught to be a boy all her life and so she thought being a boy was the best thing for her.

I think that was the best part in this section of the book. I wasn't appealed to the battle scene as much I thought I would. The duel between Karna and Arjuna was pretty cool but I didn't find it to be entirely exciting.

Draupada begs for a boy: Sikhandini

Week 13 Reading Diary A: Kichaka

p. 191-246

I thought the part of Kichaka and Draupadi was very interesting. Kichaka is such a pig for trying to assault Draupadi even though she warned him that she was protected by the gandharvas he would not listen and still tried to assault her. He deserved to be crushed by Bhima. He came to rescue Draupadi. I felt bad for Draupadi throughout the story especially in the die game. She was mistreated by all the men and don't seem to value her.

I also liked the part of Arjuna and Krishna. Krishna gave him an ultimatum to either make him as his ally or have all his soldiers. Krishna wanted Duryodhana to surrender half of his kingdom to the Pnadavas but he refused. The part where Krishna cut off Duhshana's head was intense and interesting when his body enter into Krishna's.

I also thought the Pandavas' decision to spend 13 years of exile in the Virata court in disguise was interesting. How can you spend 13 years in a disguise?! That is such a long time but they did it.

Kichaka trying to harass Draupadi: Kichaka 

Week 9 Storytelling: Urvasi in Love

Urvasi's thoughts:

I cannot stop looking at this handsome man...Oh Arjuna! You are so handsome and I must have you for myself, but how can I obtain your love? What should I do to get his attention? He is the most handsome man I've ever met and of course I want him to be my husband! Shall I seduce him with a new transformation or disguise myself and kidnap him?! I can't decide... I think I will try to seduce him and see if he wants to make love and marry me...

(looking through her wardrobe) Hmm... I think I will wear this transparent silk robe and meet him tonight! It's transparent enough for him to see... well of course enough for him to see my body! I will also spray this lovely perfume all over my body so that he will be attracted to my scent. He will surely love my appearance and then we will make love until the sunrise.

 The moon was shining bright. Urvasi approached Arjuna's room and knocked on his door. Urvasi was very anxious and hoped that Arjuna would respond to her sweet gesture. She had been a lonely woman for months now and wanted to make love with someone. Arjuna was the only attractive man that she had seen for several years and when they met. Her eyes were locked and she could not stop thinking about him. Could it be she was in love already? She had never felt this way in such a long time. Was this love at first sight? Urvasi was a curious woman and the only way to find out whether this was love or not is to approach Arjuna. Brave Urvasi took a deep breath and began to knock on his door.

The door opened with a slight creaking noise and Arjuna looked at Urvasi from head to toe.

"Um.. yes? May I help you?" said Arjuna.

"Arjuna, I am insanely attracted to you and I noticed you were looking at me earlier today. Shall we get together and have a wild wonderful night?" said Urvasi.

"Oh Urvasi, you are mistaken...I was looking at you earlier today because you remind me of my mothers Kunthi and Madri. "Your appearance caught me by surprise, and it reminded me how much I missed them." said Arjuna.

"Your mother?! I remind you of your mothers?! How dare you speak to me this way! I have tried so hard to seduce you, wearing this nearly see-through robe, and now you say I remind you of your mother?!" said Urvasi.

"I apologize for being so blunt but in fact you do remind me of my mothers. Please don't take it the wrong way. You are still a beautiful woman, just not for me." said Arjuna.

Urvasi's face turned red and she stood by Arjuna's door grunting under her breath. She had never felt so humiliated in her life.

"Well, Arjuna, since you have humiliated me by calling me your mother. I will curse you to become a eunuch forever and you will be forced to dance with the women!" said Urvasi.

Then with a swift of her hands she mumbled a chant and now Arjuna was cursed.

Urvasi cursing Arjuna: Urvasi

Author's Note:

I decided to do a story over Urvasi and Arjuna but in Urvasi's perspective. She was attracted to Arjuna but later rejected so she cursed him into a eunuch. In the story, Urvasi was a seductive and flirty woman. She tried to capture Arjuna's attention by wearing seductive clothes. Urvasi was so humiliated that she threw herself at a man who did not want her. The outcome resulted in Arjuna's curse in exile living with all women and becoming a eunuch. I kept the storyline pretty much the same as the book described it but added a lot more details. I added Urvasi's thoughts and how she planned on seducing him and making love to him all night. She was a promiscuous woman and would try to get anything she wants. I also added some dialogue of Urvasi and Arjuna to emphasize their conversations as a way to show the tensions between them. It was obvious that Urvasi was not happy with the rejection and took her frustration out on Arjuna for being too forward. Overall, I want to stick with the original story but added more details since the book only described a small part of their conversation. Urvasi was an apsara. The apsaras are beautiful supernatural beings that seduce men. I extended the story with some significant details that are not in the book such as her transparent silk robe and the perfume. I thought those items were essential to the story because it was a way for her to attract Arjuna. 

Bibliography: R.K. Narayan, The Mahabharata 1978

Week 12 Storytelling: Nala and Damayanti

Nala was the king of the Nishada people. He was a humble king and cared for his people. One day he met a beautiful woman named Damayanti and wanted her to be his wife. She was so gorgeous and everyone wanted her. The gods such as Indra, Agni, Varuna, and Yama all wanted Damayanti for themselves but Nala ended up winning Damyanti's heart. The two fell in love at first sight. This is how their love story begin.

"Nala! Nala! Come here. I'm sending you on a mission. I want you to tell Damayanti, the daughter of King Vidarbha that she must choose a husband soon. I want you to tell her the good characteristics of me. Forget the other gods! I am the suitable husband for her." said Indra.

"Yes sir, I will tell her that she must choose a husband and that you are the one for her." said Nala.

Nala began his journey to find Damayanti. His mission was to tell her that she must find a husband and persuade her that Indra is the right husband for her. He approached her place and knocked on the door. Damayanti slowly opened the door and the two of them stared into each other deeply. Nala had never seen any maiden so beautiful in his life. He was captured by her beauty. Her skin was glowing and her hair was long and luscious. 

"Err.. Oh hello... um my n-n-name is Nala. I was sent by Indra to tell you that you must f-f-find a husband." he stammered.

"Hello, my name is Damayanti. It's nice to meet you" she blushed and shyly looked away trying not to make direct eye contact.

Damayanti invited Nala to come inside and the two ended up having good conversations and shared common interests with each other. Nala knew that his mission was to tell her to choose a husband now he wanted her for himself. This girl was gorgeous and both of them have so much in common. He wanted to pursue her for himself.

"Damayanti, I was sent here to tell you that you must choose a husband to marry but you are so beautiful and we have so much in common. I have to tell you that I'm already in love with you and please please be my wife." Nala said.

"Oh Nala! I fell in love with you at first sight. When you knocked on my door I knew that there is no else I wanted but you." Damayanti said.

The two lovers decided that Nala must tell Indra and the other gods that Damayanti and him were going to be together. 

"Indra, I am sorry to tell you. I understand my mission was to tell Damayanti that you were the suitable husband for her. However, Damayanti and I fell in love and we want to be together." said Nala.

"How dare you steal the woman I'm going to marry! You snake! You did this on purpose! You think you are better than me? You think you are better than all of us gods?! Damayanti must be blind to have chose you! What qualities do you have?! How dare you!" Indra screamed.

Nala left and so Indra told the other gods what happened. The gods all decided to impersonate Nala and see who will win Damayanti's heart. They will trick and deceive Damayanti and the god that wins her heart will marry Damayanti. 

Nala and Damayanti: The Lovers

Author's Note: I decided to write a story about Nala and Damayanti. I wanted to show that they fell in love with each other at first sight. Although Nala was on a mission to tell Damayanti that she was supposed to marry one of the gods. He couldn't help but fall in love with her. Damayanti felt the same way and so Nala decided to tell Indra the truth. In the story, I emphasized the character of Nala and Damayanti. Both of them had similar interests and really understand each other. Nala did not plan to fall in love with Damayanti but the two ended up being in love. Indra was very angry and felt as if Nala had betrayed him. He felt like Nala seduced Damayanti and wanted her for himself. 

Biliography: William Buck, Mahabharata 

Week 12 Reading Diary B: Continuation of Buck's Mahabharata

p. 139-189

The story of Rishyashringa was pretty funny and interesting. It was definitely provoked by Urvashi even though she didn't mean to. It was because Vibhandaka was perverted and caught her bathing that he ejaculated and fell into the lake, so the deer swallowed and thus came out baby Rishyashringa. I thought that part was funny... if Vibhandaka wasn't so perverted maybe he could have prevented this from happening, but hey it makes the story even more interesting.

Another interesting part of this section's reading is the tale of Savitri. The reason why I liked it because it focused on a woman's perspective. Because Savitri was not impress with any men that was chosen for her she decided to search for the right man on her own. I thought Savitri was courageous to give Yama half her life just so her husband could come back to life. What a sacrifice she had made! I think the women in Indian epics had all made huge sacrifices for love and sometimes get the short end of the sick. It's not fair but it was how the story went.

Savitri made such a huge sacrifice not only for her husband but also her father-in-law. I thought it was so sweet and brave of her to put others first. I think this section of the reading is my favorite. It tells a story of a brave woman who was willing to put her love ones before herself. She was selfless and wanted her husband back.

Savitri's portrait: Savitri